The comparing mind and how to use it
Imagine a life where people were on their own side, they backed themselves, they were their own best friends and supporters, where they used their minds for themselves consistently, rather than against themselves.
Imagine the possibilities of being calm, relaxed, confident, and in control of your own thoughts and feelings, whatever the situation, and using the amazing imagination to experience life in a rich, full and expressive way.
This life exists, and can exist for anyone who can open themselves to the idea of learning about themselves, of expanding their awareness, of committing to develop the fundamental belief in themselves, despite the way they may feel at a given time and place.
The Dalai Lama, from a Buddhist perspective, speaks of hope, of a hope that people can attain genuine and lasting happiness, and whilst he recognises that it may not be easy, that it nevertheless can be done.
I agree with him wholeheartedly, and is consistent with what I have experienced in many different situations whilst working with the mind, both my own, and of others.
The problem that many people face, whether in their personal lives, business lives or in seeking high level performance is one of comparison. In this age of social media, where everyone is 'connected', it is easy to see how people can compare their own 'normal' lives to other people's highlights that are posted on social media sites, and to feel envious of what they have, or what they do, and to conclude that your own life is not as good as theirs, and that you are essentially not good enough.
In sport, many athletes at all levels may focus a huge amount of energy (actual energy that cannot be used for enhancing their performance) on how they are not as good, as fast, as strong, as determined as their competitors, and therefore conclude that they are not good enough. Many also experience powerful physical symptoms from these thoughts, including lack of sleep, irritable bowel, pain and others.
In business, it is common for people to prepare themselves for interviews or presentations that they have to deliver with feelings of dread, angst, and fear, only to find that although their experience leading up to the event was not enjoyable (and solely created by them), and was tense, they actually really enjoyed the actual event itself.
H.L. Mencken's definition of a wealthy man is: 'one whose income is 100 dollars a year higher than his wife's sister's husband' is an accurate reflection of how many people think and use their minds.
So, if you are a person that is constantly comparing yourself to other people, it may be beneficial for you to continue doing so. However, rather than comparing yourself to other people who you feel are richer, smarter, or more of an authority than you, and creating feelings of low self worth, and criticism of the self. Spend some time each day comparing yourself to people who are worse off than you, who have less than you in terms of physical, mental and emotional assets. This is not to create feelings of ego, but to create feelings of gratitude.
Studies abound that show the same decrease in mood and performance and satisfaction in life that results in negative comparison, is correlated by increased feelings of self worth, satisfaction, and contentment when people compare themselves to people who are worse off than themselves, and express gratitude for what they have.
If you take this step, actually take an action in experimenting seriously with thinking in this way for a period of time, you will be surprised at the results.
It is the same rule of the mind that is operating, and you become aware of the fact that you actually have some control of your feelings, in fact you are a large influence on them all of the time. This in itself builds feelings of confidence, and control, and hopefully leads to you realising that there is so much more you can learn about your mind, and it is not complicated, yet simple and beautiful and consistent.
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